Category WTF Technology Bitching

I received the following email from Dell . Does anybody there even read this stuff?

I realize this is an automated system, and whenever you automate things there are bound to be issues, but this is just silly. How hard could it possibly be to whip up some @Formula or LotusScript to compose and send (or at least replace the tags using something like @ReplaceSubstring) this email?

My guess is they are NOT using Lotus Notes / Domino.

---- Forwarded by Devin Olson on 07/20/2010 04:45 AM -----
From: No_reply@dell.com
To: devin.olson @ azlighthouse.com
Date: 07/13/2010 10:39 AM
Subject: From Dell Customer Care l Service Request Number [Action.SR Number] DT01

Dear [Action.Contact First Name] [Action.Contact Last Name],

Thank you for your recent contact with Dell Customer Care. We appreciate the opportunity to address your issue.

Service Request Number [Action.SR Number]

Hopefully this issue has been resolved to your satisfaction. However, if you still require assistance with Service Request Number [Action.SR Number], please leave the subject line intact and forward this email to US_CAG_Ownership@dell.com with a brief description of the issue. Be sure to notify us of the best time to call you as well as the phone number(s) where you can be reached.

Your satisfaction is very important to us. Thank you for choosing Dell.

Respectfully,

[Action.Owner First Name] [Action.Owner Last Name]

THIS IS AN AUTOMATED EMAIL RESPONSE. PLEASE DO NOT REPLY TO THIS MESSAGE

sigh

When you develop an automated system ALWAYS TEST IT BEFORE GOING TO PRODUCTION!

Posted by Devin Olson At 13:10:49 Location Cascade Township, MI | Permalink | Comments (3)

Category Fun Stupid Dialogs

"I don't give a damn 'bout my bad replication!
The world's in trouble there's no communication;
and everyone can say what they wanna say,
it never gets better anyway.
So why should I care 'bout a bad replication anyway?
Oh no, not me!"

(with apologies to Joan Jett)

Posted by Devin Olson At 21:55:21 Location Cascade Township, MI | Permalink | Comments (1)

Category Beer

Guess who made Spanky's Nice List this year

Posted by Devin Olson At 04:06:45 Location Cascade Township, MI | Permalink | Comments (2)

Category History

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses, row on row
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.
We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.
-John McCrae, 1915.

Memorial Day is tomorrow. For those of you who don't recognize it; the photo at for this entry is of the Tomb of the Unknowns in Arlington National Cemetery.

Here Rests,
In Honored Glory,
An American Soldier,
Known But To God

We cherish too, the Poppy red
That grows on fields where valor led,
It seems to signal to the skies
That blood of heroes never dies.
-Moina Michael , 1915

Do you remember?

-Devin

Posted by Devin Olson At 00:00:00 Location Cascade Township, MI | Permalink | Comments (0)

Category Technical

Those of you using a Dell Precision Workstation and needing to hit CTRL BREAK to stop an action may have noticed that there is no BREAK key labeled on the keyboard. The correct key combination is:

CTRL + Fn (Function) + F12 (pause)

Hope this helps!

Posted by Devin Olson At 04:12:04 Location Jackson, MS | Permalink | Comments (0)

Category News and Events Personal

Rest In Peace Malcolm

You need hands to hold someone you care for
You need hands to show that you're sincere
When you feel nobody wants to know you
You need hands to brush away the tears

When you hold a brand new baby
You need tender hands to guide them on their way
You need hands to thank the Lord for living
And for giving us this day

Let's dance for the ladies and gentlemen....

You need hands to show the world you're happy
And you need hands when you have to stop the bus
But the hands we love so dear are the hands we love to hear
Are the hands that you give to us
Everybody, are the hands that you give
Everybody, that's nice, thank you,
Thank you ladies and gentlemen, thank you

-Malcolm McLaren, 1946 - 2010

Posted by Devin Olson At 11:42:25 Location Cascade Township, MI | Permalink | Comments (0)

Category Fun

If you are an owner of a dog or know someone who has a dog which belongs to a 'dangerous breed' category, and if you have a child visiting your house, please take this as a warning. . .
DO NOT leave your dog unattended with any small child for any reason!

All it takes is one tiny moment for this to happen.
Thank you
The Dog

Posted by Devin Olson At 14:29:49 Location Cascade Township, MI | Permalink | Comments (1)

Category Fun Announcements Career

February 1st is National Working Naked Day. It is a day for millions of Home Office Professionals (HOPs) to try to improve the way they work from home by stripping away their anxieties about working from home. This doesn't apply only to those who are self employed; anybody who spends a majority of their work time in a Home Office is a HOP.

In addition to a lack of (or severely lessened) support from a corporate office; I've discovered (from personal experience) that one of the biggest issues HOPs face is a complete cutoff of "water cooler" communications. While this might seem a blessing to you corporate-types ("quit the chit-chat and get back to work"); this type of communication is an often unnoticed yet extremely critical medium of information exchange. On the surface this gossip, chit-chat, half-joking type of conversation may appear to have a low signal vs. noise ratio; but that assumption could not be further from the truth. The signal is just not obvious. It is there, hidden amid myriad layers of blathering prattle, and it is quite strong. The nuggets of information carried in these quiet hallway conversations are diamonds of truth about what is going on (both good and bad) with regard to every project, client, venture, asset, goal and employee of the company.

Don't Go Dark

For the HOP; getting to these diamonds, even in today's modern age of communication, even equipped with the best collaborative tools in the world, takes hard work, dedication, and patience. You need to ping / call / email your boss and your co-workers on a regular basis with "pointless" requests. They, being in the corporate environment, are not even aware of how cut off you may be feeling. These interruptions allow you to both gather and give this non-official, yet critical information. I'm not saying make stuff up, nor am I saying to bother them for no reason. What I am saying is that while your pings / calls / emails may not appear to have any project pertinent reason they are still valid. Don't be an ass and overdo it. Your boss trusts that you are capable of working "unsupervised", so don't abuse that trust with a continual barrage of yakety-yak. Occasionally calling up a boss or co-workers just to say "hi -what's up?" may seem like an unwarranted interruption; but it helps maintain your relationship -it reminds both your peer, and you, that you are still part of the team. Just remember what "occasionally" means.

-Devin

Posted by Devin Olson At 13:27:14 Location Cascade Township, MI | Permalink | Comments (4)

Category Personal Announcements
<proudpappa>

I attended a Reading Awards ceremony this morning at my daughter's school. The top readers from the 5th and 6th grade were recognized for their reading proficiency.

My daughter Ryley is one of the children who read over a million words during the first semester. That works out to about 1 Harry Potter size book a week; outside of regular school work and reading assignments. Good Job Ryley!

</proudpappa>

Posted by Devin Olson At 15:30:16 Location Cascade Township, MI | Permalink | Comments (8)

Category Fun

Perhaps I should consider purging some old docs from this nsf, followed by a replication / compaction?

Anybody have any idea how long to expect 400,000+ deletion stubs to replicate?

-Devin

Posted by Devin Olson At 19:19:09 Location Cascade Township, MI | Permalink | Comments (4)